No New Shoes…

My love for shoes

This is my confession: I have a fetish for shoes. It hasn’t started recently, it dates as far back as I can remember. When I was a small girl, and the only shoes one would have were practical shoes which were multipurpose, serving as school shoes and being used every other day, I would make any excuse to be bought a new pair of  ‘school shoes’, just so that I could have enough pairs to  interchange. My love for shoes has gone on. Now that I’m all grown and I buy myself shoes, I have over twenty pairs and they are still not enough. I find myself lacking the ‘right’ shoe to put on from my collection, and that is enough for me to take  note in my mind that I need another pair, which looks like this or like that, to go with such and such garments. I go window shopping for shoes any time, and end up buying shoes on impulse.

In White Heels

Heels Anytime

I have decided to break this habit of buying shoes just for the sake of it. I’m trying to discipline my self on that. I have to ‘earn it’, for me to get it. In line with this, I had a plan to start me off.

Self-Reward

The other day I  had a test. I wanted to do very very well in that test, to get a High Distinction for it, going by the grading system at the college I am at. I had in mind to have a self reward scheme, promising myself that if I get that high Distinction, then I would  get me a new pair of shoes to go with a certain new dress I was bought for by a friend.

I prepared well for that test and was sure that that was a high distinction to be recorded and hence a new pair of shoes. Minutes before the test, I was on twitter busy tweeting instead of doing those last minute look-ups. After all, I had read everything, and felt like I had it all in mind.

The test turned out to be one of those test that gave me a shocker making me question my much studying and practice. It wasn’t in any way an easy test. “If this is how I feel and think about this test, what about the rest of my classmates?” I questioned myself. “If it did not go well with me, then it was the same case for the rest” I thought.

I could only wait to know the results.

No New Shoes!

A few days later, I got to college and  met some of my class mates already there. The first thing to be told was about the test results. They had it that six persons had passed  the test and seven had failed. ‘What?’ My bad feelings about the result were confirmed. Right there and then, I wanted to know what I had managed to get. The result slips were brought later for me to find that I had 82.76% , which was the best mark in class. Oh! Too bad for me. 82.76% is a Distinction that is 2.24points less my targeted High Distinction which starts at 85%!!

It’s good enough that I passed, passed well given  the class standards. However, I missed a High Distinction, and it follows that, there is no new pair of shoes for me…I am an honest person and honesty starts with me to me….The shoes will have to wait….the new dress can remain unworn for a while until I get the right shoes to go with it……

©Felicity

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